Figure Skating

I need you to ice skate through my feelings and penetrate your blades of understanding…

I’m not gonna go there.  I’m not gonna go down that route of questioning why they don’t stay.  I’m not going to question him and pinpoint things I wish he could have said or done when I was younger.  I’m not going to question why the only guys that seem to be attracted to me are old, bearded, sweaty men that happen to be a million times my age.  I won’t go there.  I won’t question why I cry at every love story.  I won’t admit that it pains me to no end when I am not loved in return.  I won’t say that subconsciously it is a direct reflection of my burning desire to love and to be loved in return.  I can’t. Because if I pity myself I make myself a victim of circumstance.  But I will say that it kills me.  It kills me that I am unable to give the love that I wholeheartedly suppress.  I will admit that the protective ice that I sculpt around my heart makes me shiver.  It makes me sick.  But before I’m free to release heat, I need to know that you’re not just as hot as I am.  I need you to ice skate through my feelings and penetrate your blades of understanding to make figures around where it hurts the most and make it beautiful. Skate so long that you don’t even feel the cold chill running down your spine anymore. Warm up to me because every warm-up is a gentle preparation for the complete performance. I need you to skate, skate, skate, skate, LEAP, SPIN, land, now spin, spin, spin, one leg up, spin, spin, spin, keep spinning, spin, spin, strike a pose, now stop! Breathtaking! Now, we’re ready for the full show.  Let’s just glide for now…

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