Be Happy For Others While Safeguarding Your Own Feelings

Be happy for others while safeguarding your own feelings.  This is a topic that isn’t touched on very often because it’s usually seen in a negative light.  But I want to discuss it and give you my personal experience.

There are moments in our lives when we feel left out.  We feel that our opportunities have been overlooked and here we are standing, waiting for our turn at happiness.  That in itself can be taken in various ways.  Any one person can present the argument that we must go after the things we want and not just wait for things to happen. This is true to an extent.  If anyone is like me, then these words are specifically for you.  We understand that we are an elite class of people where our primary pursuits are not external but spiritual – meaning that we understand that some things are “gifts” and if used appropriately are huge blessings for our everlasting satisfaction.  That’s the goal right?  The final product.  In the meantime, we live a life of service to others while at the same time deadening and pummeling what is, by nature, pure and beautiful for the purpose of not imposing on our own individual rights to use it as an excuse or crutch for personal gratification.  Do you follow me?  If so, let’s continue…

So here we are.  We love the people around us – our friends, our families.  We are happy for their successes, their triumphs and wish them eternal joy.  Really.  But… (but what?) But, after awhile, you begin to think: What’s wrong with me?  When will be my turn?  Am I not good enough?  Am I not trying hard enough? Promotion after promotion, privilege after privilege, engagement after engagement, marriage after marriage, baby after baby!  God bless them all and Bravo!  Here’s the thing:  You are good enough.  You are imperfectly perfect.  Your feelings are valid and you should not be quickly labeled as ‘Jealous’ or ‘Envious’ or even ‘Selfish’.  You have a tremendous amount of love for people and that is something that could never be forced.  You are doing well.  Only take all of that energy and refocus it.  Enjoy the simple things in life like hearing your loud mother laugh over the phone,  sharing in family group messages, feel the warmth of the sun and the calming after effects of the wind.  You have breath and you have life.  Your crazy grandmother is still hanging in there complaining about everything, but she’s yours and she’s alive!  Get to know other people and keep your circle small and substantive while being open to new people.  There’s no need for you to know every single person in your city bouncing around at every moment on every weekend.  That only reveals that you are escaping some feeling that you are too afraid to confront.  Face yourself,  face your feelings, analyze them and be truthful with yourself.  It is okay to feel hurt at times.  It is okay to cry.  But never allow that to make you become bitter towards those you love and those who love you in return.  Do not punish them for their own happiness (even if they cheated to get to that place).  They deserve this moment as you do yours.  Step away if you need to recollect your thoughts and the pieces of your heart.  Deactivate your social media accounts.  Do whatever is necessary to be happy for others while safeguarding your own feelings.  And when your time comes…Lord! When the time comes, spill all of those emotions of love on the blessing that stands before you and on the people who have stuck around.

Be well.

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